Before any theory, a scene.
Your pattern is easier to recognise by looking at a concrete moment than by answering a test. Tests label; scenes show you. And only what appears in a scene, in the body, in real time, is workable.
Don't ask yourself "what pattern am I?". Ask yourself "when was the last time it fired?". A meeting where you pushed too hard. An email you sent while still hot. A conversation you dodged for the umpteenth time. A decision you took on yourself when you could have let it go. A small criticism that landed on a large wound.
That scene is worth more than any generic description.
Looking honestly at what happened there calls for a particular stance: neither self-flagellation nor rationalisation. Neither martyrdom nor self-congratulation. An honest and compassionate gaze at the same time.
Compassion without honesty becomes complicity. Honesty without compassion becomes cruelty. The two together are maturity.
Your mind has a sophisticated repertoire of alibis for not looking: relativising, comparing, contextualising, intellectualising, playing it down, putting it all down to circumstances, saying "I'm not only that".
And it's true: you are not only that. But that truth can also serve you as a way of not looking.
The most common traps are easy to recognise:
"I'm not like that." Denial. "Yes, but I also have this other quality." Dilution. "It's just that in those circumstances…" Justification. "This only happens to me when I'm tired." Compartmentalisation.
Each time one of these phrases appears, don't condemn it. Observe it. It may be precisely the sign that you are close to something important.
And a special case. "I don't recognise myself in any of the six patterns." Sometimes it's true. More often it means something else: "I'm not ready to recognise myself yet". Don't force it. Start from any scene of pressure and let whatever needs to surface, surface.
Your pattern lives where there is pressure, hurry or fear. In calm, we are all our best version. The pattern appears in the rush.
Recognising it doesn't mean defining yourself by it. You are far more than your shadow. But until you see it, it can keep running part of your life without asking permission.
Looking at yourself is one of the bravest things you can do for your team. And also for the people who live close to you.
To notice: when was the last time something fired in you under pressure? A concrete scene, with a date if you can. Stay with that scene for a few minutes. There is your first piece of data.
To try this week: carry a small notebook for seven days. Each time you notice a disproportionate inner reaction, jot down three things: what happened, what you felt, what you did. Don't interpret yet. Don't explain. Don't defend yourself. Just gather data.